Allume-inate

Jessica had signed up too, unbeknownst to me until we had coffee a couple months ago. Jessica blogs here. I love reading her words and hearing her preach at Quest Church.   Wise way beyond her years, this one.

My registration to Allume signified a commitment to God, and to myself to create.   To do the thing that had been placed inside me since I scribbled on paper behind the Christmas tree in 4th grade, too afraid to share my words even with family:

WRITE.

We writer-types spend a lot of time alone, with keyboards staring at screens.  We hold pens late at night and in carpool line and wrestle with words.  So I longed for some community.
I registered and I joined conversations on Twitter and Facebook and began studying other bloggers. I asked for prayer from friends and started to find online writing communities and groups that shared the thing deep inside me that needed to come out. I built a blog.   From scratch.   In between work and kids and often on very little sleep. I wondered if I was crazy. (Others probably did too…just please keep comments at a minimum.  I’m vulnerable.)

The weekend finally arrived.
I expected to hear keynote speakers and be inspired and learn a few things about the craft. I expected to feel small in a vast ocean of talent.  A speck of light amongst big stars.
What I did not expect was the amount of grace, community, and power to be found by sitting at tables together and the message that united us:

We all must create for an audience of ONE, and wrestle our own stories out with God.

Ann and Nancy:  THIS is community.  Yellow nail polish and laughing BIG.

I did not expect 20 minutes after arriving at the hotel in Greenville to run into Jennifer. To hug her neck and have her chide me for being a “Blue Jean Girl” wearing black leggings.  This Iowa soul-sister who had placed my words on her blog and encouraged me with comments the past few months.
Have you pre-ordered Jennifer’s book? ——> Just go ahead and do it here.

I did not expect God to weave Bonnie into my life.  Bonnie,  a 2-year breast cancer survivor who has carved out a blog to support others facing cancer.  To hold her hand as she told me she had received a Lydia tote and had read the poem I penned in 1997. That we were already sisters.

I did not expect to stand next to Ann Voskamp raising my hands high, singing acapella .

I did not expect to turn and see Edie seated next to me at dinner.  To laugh with her over the impact she has had on my eyeshadow application skills.  To be able to share with her 1:1 how I watched her family rebuild their home and lives after the fire that destroyed everything except a teal chair found in the rubble. The next day I sat on the floor during her session and listened to her speak.  Her words, a sermon, with the focus on what cannot be taken away. I cried fresh tears of loss and nodded “yes” too many times to count.
Not familiar with Edie?  (Ohmystars click her image below and read this now):

I did not expect to run into Emily P. Freeman as she was searching for chocolate after her keynote speech.  To thank her for her book  Graceful. To hold her glance and say “thank you” for her words that will help my daughter be braver in a world with so many expectations.

Thank you Allume. Thank you for connecting so many beautiful women who wash each others feet with words. Thanks for sending me home with new eyes and a new heart for writing. (And a new splash of color:  You know how much I love you KP/Mom)

Thanks for reminding me that we are all stars.
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Deep Breath.  Writing for an Audience of One~ this is my calling.
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And here I sit. Two nights after returning from Allume I sit amid the voices of my daughter’s high school show choir. And I remembered, again. We all shine brightly.  HE made us each a star, with our own light, and our own voice.

Take some time to meet a few of my Blue Jean Sisters: Their words will bless you.
Mangrove Ministries—–> (missed you~ Allume next year?) Bonnie Jessica Shelly Michelle Emily Nancy Edie Jennifer Allume Keynote Speakers (watch them ALL~ seriously.  Worth every second.)